The asshole in front of me is texting and driving right as I'm tweeting this.
Walking with our phones, we all look like Star Trek crew members trying to get a life form reading on an uncharted planet.
If there isn't an Eastern European dating site called Czech Mate, we're doing this wrong.
"Mommy, why is it 110 degrees outside every day?" "Well, son, on June 1st 2017..."