Ask yourself this: Am I trying to resolve this conflict or am I trying to prove that I'm right?
Truth without grace is just mean. It is possible to speak the truth and be gracious about how you do it.
Apologize for your behaviors. Do not apologize for how they feel. I"'m sorry I did ____." Not, "I'm sorry that you are angry."
How to escalate conflict: Insist that you know the other person's real intention even when they insist that you have it wrong.
Stop long enough to understand. Ask, listen, and observe before you take any action.