Hmm. The back of this jar of chutney says 'Once opened, use a single spoonful then store at the back of the fridge until the end of time.'
The BBC seem to have inadvertently run an old episode of Cold Feet in place of this week's Sherlock.
Ah! The veggie burger dilemma. Delicious lightly battered veg, crispy and tasty and fresh; or grey compacted puck of sludge made of beans?
The cycle is complete. I know another day has ended now that I've turned my speakhole into an ashtray.