Just want/need the world to know that instead of saying “I moisturized my legs,” my mom says, “I creamed my legs.”
Why are we doing this? Do we really even need a President? #GOPDebate
On the off chance that the asshole bird outside my window follows me on Twitter: SHUT THE FUCK UP! Thx!
How am I the only one who knows when it's ok to talk over the TV?
Spilling your glass of wine is the adult version of dropping your ice cream cone.