"If your phone gets wet, put it in a bag of rice. This will attract Asians who will fix it for you."
Seen on reddit: "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" "I don't know, I don't have 2020 vision." #slowclap
Hahaha, one paavam guy asked in one intellectual forum "Where does one begin with Freud?" and was greeted with "Your mom."