That Minotaur that dragged Madonna down the stairs is SO unemployed right now
Oh my God!!! Who sent me this massive bunch of red roses?????!!!!! No one. That's who. No one. Piss off!
It's World Water Day! For every RT this gets, @LifeWaterUK will give 100 gallons of clean water to someone in need. #cleanwaterforall
Don't worry Madge I saw the same thing happen to the Scottish Widow on an escalator in hove #capeskill
2016 can just fuck off.
#pissflaps is my favourite swearword - let's get this trending @chattyman! x