Tonight, I tripped over the foot of the author of "Buddhism For Dummies." I have no joke for this.
Overheard on bus, dude just out of jail to pregnant ex-meth user: "Sobriety looks really good on you." Pardon, there's something in my eye.
Teenager is explaining One Direction to @EffingBoring and this might be the best Thanksgiving ever.
Folks, the time for Steven Tyler to be humanely live-trapped and released into the wilderness is upon us.