Unless you actually are Twitter, chances are Twitter Bootstrap is not the solution to your problems.
Protip: set font-size for <input> to 16px to prevent mobile Safari from zooming in on focus.
Not sure why I missed this over a month ago, but this article by @Una is insanely awesome: una.im/3d-effect
Let me repeat: by disabling zooming of your site for touch devices, you break the internet. (Also: you’re an asshole.)