Ellen does so many great giveaways. But she should do a takeaway every so often, like, "SURPRISE! EVERYONE IN THE AUDIENCE OWES ME $10,000!"
People who keep a harmonica in their pocket are basically saying, "I can easily make this all about me in about 3 seconds."
Pumpkin-carving is that one time of the year where you get to be unsettled by how good your significant other is at handling a knife.
Loving Facebook's new "People You Wish You Didn't Know" recommendation feature.