Writing is a way of converting childhood trauma into very small quantities of money.
How to write a feature. 1. Spend 8 weeks writing a witty and erudite 1st paragraph. 2. Write the rest in 6 hours. 3. Delete 1st paragraph.
Email etiquette: Mon & Tues, say "Hope you had a good weekend"; Thurs & Fri, say "Have a good weekend"; Weds say "Death gapes for us all".