The fact that we all forget what day it is over the relatively short Xmas break is a strong indication of how fragile our society is
I see Tim Peake couldn't even be bothered to land in Britain. Nigel Farage would have parked that on top of Big Ben and walked out smoking
I've just turned the TV on and Dappy is being handcuffed to Liz Jones. I picked a bad week to give up LSD.
At my funeral, I want Meryl Streep crying in five different accents. Joan RIP.
Don't be old or poor or disabled or foreign or young or pregnant or a fox for the next four years.